Imogen

14 Years ago I heard this name in a movie and i instantly fell in love with the name. It is very classic and out of the ordinary yet there is a subtile beauty to it . After so many years past the name drifted from my mind and suddendly i hear the name again and it hit me like a ton of bricks. The Name was so vivid and my heart flickered as it did when i first heard the name when i was 11 years old. I couldn’t believe i had forgotten the name in the first place. 

This name is indeed a special one to me. Just how hearing the name has an effect on me, Also the use of the name will come to me in a way that can not be spoken of. 

Lesson

In 4 years I will be 30. As I sit back and look at how my life is progressing, I feel content but a deep longing.  A longing for something greater, for my life to have more substance and stability.  But then there is a tinge of rebellion and adventure,   Something devious. 

Stardust

I woke up restless, yearning for adventure. My Body is aroused with lack of spark, but then my phone rings and I see the name of a man’s company I enjoy. Suddenly I move about swiftly and mind is working acutely. Excitement sends waves up and down my body as i am sure my White Horse will come……

It would be nice to say I like you more than your benefits,

But you will always remain to be my little personal affair,

You enhance me in ways i cant believe i can’t do on my own.

There are times i love to speak my way of the world and debate with einstien, Then there are times when I dread speaking on my numb tongue. 

I hate you in the Morning, Regretting you spent the night.

Then we Makeup at night and never want to part. 

You make me feel like i can leave you forever at anytime,

Like i grown child from his parents, Then I run back to you and hide underground as you shield me away from everything. 

Why do you control my body in ways i can never duplicate in my honor-est state?

The Sex Goddess by tongue, spirit and body.

Sugar my Tongue, Sugar me there

Mojo sends me over the top.

I refuse to stop, But you my friend

Will always be a good memory i shall keep within me.

Something Devious and Crazy,

The only Rebellious me…

Bond Fire

I want to kick off my shoes and take a shower. Then I want to gather all of the newspaper I can gather.

 

 

Damaged

I go off the deep end to express myself to you, 

Yet still I the Crazy one, with Wild eyes.

Emotions overwhelm me and I have no release,

Who do I tell? Who do I talk to? You  were nowhere around,

Abandoning and Isolating me with just memories.

There is noting left to me but a skeleton and debris of my loveless woes,

My heart lied. When it gushed for you and assured me to let go and love,

Only I was left with what was and will never be.

Damaged is what I have to be, Damaged has become me.

 

Indignant

In a Blink of An eye everything changed. Truth’s were spoken and Love was lost….

I wanted things to be OK. I didn’t believe you had some much animosity towards me nor that it was so strong.  You spoke your words with such abundant hatred. In a blink of an Eye.

Cheap Shots and assumptions plague the facts, and tasteless insults shot back and forth. Our bond was once deep as roots.

Indignant rage and pain fills my soul now. When you cross my Mind, ill feelings engulf my heart sinking it to the bottom pits of my stomach.

I ask myself how did things come to this? I wonder when did it begin? Looking back at the times and the signs , i should have seen it coming a long time ago. But it just goes to show how trust makes you so vulnerable.

The wedge between us is huge and a unnecessary one. But it will be one that will always remain. 2 FACES I can’t recognize.

 

Starting From Scratch

This is a New year and so much has changed. I am learning new lessons and building myself to be the best person I can be one baby step at a time. I am focusing on my career and  trying to permanently establish myself. One of my biggest goals i would love to achieve before this year is over is to get a car. That is like primary. And from there I want to improve little by little.. I know it is going to be hard and that is the part i have to prepare for. I need to put more energy and drive in the things that i need to do.  I feel stronger in certain area’s and I can see certain area’s I need to work on as well. I don’t want to be brought down and put down, So in a way i am glad I have been in solitude for a minute and just be around my closest allies. I am shelter and able to retreat and construct my next move.

A New Chapter In My Life.

I am going through a new stage in my life, It’s a struggle now but I am still driven to be where I want to be in life. I want to do different things, I want to try different things. Like Do I really think I can really have a career typing all day? Do I still want to make the food industry my career choice just because i love it and that has been my path since I started working and that is pretty much what I know and am used to?  Is this the time to play it safe or explore my horizons?  I know one thing for sure, I definitely have to do things different and change things for the better.

Dancers among us!

I love this!!! Great Pictures. Really Captures the essence and feelings blended with the elements

Chicquero

“The inspiration for this book came to me one afternoon as I watched my son, Hudson, playing with his toy bus. I was trying to keep pace with his three-year-old mind as he got deeper and deeper into a fantasy involving nothing more than a yellow plastic box and armless figurines. At least that’s what I saw. He saw frantic commuters rushing to catch the 77 local bus to Australia. He jumped in place, mouth open and slapping his knees, joyously reacting to a world I couldn’t see, but one powerfully present for him.”

“What happens to this enthusiasm, this ability to be wholly present in the moment? Why are these pure moments of passion so often replaced with cynicism, boredom, and indifference? As I played with my son, I thought about creating photographs that would show the world as if through his eyes. The people in the images…

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Sullen

Walking down the gritty streets, Misfortune and Ugliness surrounds me.

I am a piece of the garbage blowing about, along with the rift raft lined up against the fences.

My insides twist with despair. Oh, the decisions I have made, Confliction on my beliefs.

Slowly the memories flow before my eyes,  You voice echos in my head, vivid as so I can almost see the smoke rise as though seeing the heat coming from your mouth. And still after knowing what I know, the mere thought of you knocks down all my defenses.

I can almost see the smoke rise as though seeing the heat coming from your mouth. And still after knowing what I know, the mere thought of you knocks down all my defenses.

I have lost you, or I never had you. I am still confused on whether I am hurt by your betrayal or I am pleased to have the memories with you, Memories of you loving me.

As I walk my body hangs low and slump. Some part of me is missing, What am I lacking?  Was it all Lies?

I say this to myself,  grasping for an excuse for you. A reason to believe just to get me through.

This day mirrors my thoughts, gloomy and dark. A constant moisture shields my tears, City life drowns the sound of my cries.

Sullen. My heart beats never like it did before. The speed from the anticipation of your call, or when I knew it was near for me to see you,  I have never felt again. Moments when our eyes locked, watching you talk, being close to you..

Even remembering these moments makes my heart skip a beat and my eye’s flood with tears, as I know I am no longer waiting for you, no longer grasping all of you, even longing for your call.

The pain stabs my soul.  Emptiness fills my whole body.  My heart is Shallow and hollow. My cries echo within me.

Sullen, Is my face. The color has left me, My eye’s no longer gleam.  My mind constantly drifts in hopes of seeing you again. Passing me by on the street or driving by.

I get lost in wondering if you would remember my face in the crowd, Would your heart flutter? Would a smile curve on your lips or  would your eyes hide their existence?

I am tormented every second. With the loss, the devastation and utter pain of losing you, As I am haunted with the hopes and fear of our reunion.

The cold bites my face,  but I am numb.  I walk aimlessly, dreading the night fall. Darkness surrounding me, highlighting the loneliness I feel.

As this night drags and this hole enlarges, I am swallowed in endless misery.  bouts of hysteria overwhelms me with, but there is not outlet. No release from this term, which was once Love between You and I.

I look at a store window to see my reflection, what I found staring back at me was fading away.