Bond Fire

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I want to kick off my shoes and take a shower. Then I want to gather all of the newspaper I can gather.





I go off the deep end to express myself to you, 

Yet still I the Crazy one, with Wild eyes.

Emotions overwhelm me and I have no release,

Who do I tell? Who do I talk to? You  were nowhere around,

Abandoning and Isolating me with just memories.

There is noting left to me but a skeleton and debris of my loveless woes,

My heart lied. When it gushed for you and assured me to let go and love,

Only I was left with what was and will never be.

Damaged is what I have to be, Damaged has become me.



In a Blink of An eye everything changed. Truth’s were spoken and Love was lost….

I wanted things to be OK. I didn’t believe you had some much animosity towards me nor that it was so strong.  You spoke your words with such abundant hatred. In a blink of an Eye.

Cheap Shots and assumptions plague the facts, and tasteless insults shot back and forth. Our bond was once deep as roots.

Indignant rage and pain fills my soul now. When you cross my Mind, ill feelings engulf my heart sinking it to the bottom pits of my stomach.

I ask myself how did things come to this? I wonder when did it begin? Looking back at the times and the signs , i should have seen it coming a long time ago. But it just goes to show how trust makes you so vulnerable.

The wedge between us is huge and a unnecessary one. But it will be one that will always remain. 2 FACES I can’t recognize.


Starting From Scratch

This is a New year and so much has changed. I am learning new lessons and building myself to be the best person I can be one baby step at a time. I am focusing on my career and  trying to permanently establish myself. One of my biggest goals i would love to achieve before this year is over is to get a car. That is like primary. And from there I want to improve little by little.. I know it is going to be hard and that is the part i have to prepare for. I need to put more energy and drive in the things that i need to do.  I feel stronger in certain area’s and I can see certain area’s I need to work on as well. I don’t want to be brought down and put down, So in a way i am glad I have been in solitude for a minute and just be around my closest allies. I am shelter and able to retreat and construct my next move.